Child, You Are His

It is in those still moments when it hits you; when you are flooded with the felt experience of Jesus knowing you. Knowing those secrets, that season, those thoughts. Knowing your flaws and where you are weak. My sin. Every last piece of it. I look up and I know that I am but a vapor - here today and gone tomorrow. Even as He sees into the recesses of my heart and turns me inside out, there is an unexplainable and overwhelming love. He is mindful of me. I do not have to cringe, cower, or hide.

I never liked nor fully understood sayings like "May the blood of Jesus wash over me." I didn't care for the image. I don't particularly like blood. I hate violence. Until not that long ago when I was thinking about it more deeply, did I realize how important the blood was and should not be overlooked. It poured out for me. FOR ME. I could look at it. I could pick up a cloth and tenderly dab at it. My Jesus. My king. I could look Him in the eyes and see the tenderness despite His agony. 

The world will brow beat me. People will hurt me. My own thoughts could strangle me, truth be told. Sometimes, I think that I am running through a maze as a girl looking for the way out, crying to be saved. Breathless. And, when no one comes I retreat inward. I curl up and believe I have no one to depend on but myself. As I get swallowed up into the tiniest of spaces and my breathing returns to normal, His face is there. It is quiet. Piece by piece He dismantles the lie as He lifts my chin and untangles my arms. I am perfectly good. I am perfectly welcomed. I am perfectly acceptable. I am safe. 

Jesus Christ is dependable. No matter what is impossible. No matter who has let you down. No matter what you have done. Child, you are HIS.

Dee M. Kostelyk

Father

I received a little handheld electric frother from Jesse for Christmas a few days ago. I used it with my coffee for the first time this morning and it was delicious. Sometimes, it is those little things that give me the joy of a kid. 

It's my birthday today and it just happened that I am not working. Yay! I made my coffee, propped up my pillows and got back into bed. I sat there and looked out the window watching a few squirrels. I am not sure what came over me but my eyes welled with tears as I had a yearning for Jesus to come sit at the end of my bed and have coffee with me. I wanted to be in His physical presence, in the flesh. I imagined for a few seconds what that would look like. Then, I opened my Bible and intentionally went to Psalm 18 which is probably my favorite passage in scripture. It starts out with, "I love you, O Lord, my strength." There it was. What else could I have said but that?

It is true that God's word is alive. As I read this Psalm written by David in gratitude for deliverance, I noticed something I had not before. After David described his anguish and distress, he cried to God for help. He then went on to paint a detailed picture of God coming to save him. He described the Earth trembling, smoke rising from God's nostrils, heaven being parted, cherubim flying, hail and bolts of lightning, arrows being shot, enemies being scattered, and the Lord rebuking David's enemies with a blast of breath from His nostrils. He described a very powerful God fiercely intent on not only rescuing and protecting him, but destroying his enemies as well. David took great care in describing the details of this. As I read, I could see it all in my head, this raging God bent on rescuing David, the man after His heart. 

So, this is what struck me that I had not noticed before. David went from this edge of your seat powerful scene to sharing how God reached down and took hold of him, drawing him out of the deep waters and rescuing him. Verse 19 says, "He brought me out into a spacious place; He rescued me because he *delighted* in me." Wow. I felt like I got new insight into the very character of God Almighty - from a full-on rush of mental, physical, and emotional literal superpower to the tenderness God beheld for David in His delight of him. Abba Dad in action. The perfect dad, actually. The One who turns our darkness into light like no other in all the universe. He is multifaceted and cannot be contained.

While I did not get to see Jesus in the flesh, He did prompt me to see Him in this Psalm; His personal word to me this morning on my 52nd birthday. The message was that I meant everything to Him. The Earth will tremble and there will be hail and lightning as He swiftly makes His way to me, over and over until my last breath. Why? Because He is unfailingly kind and delights in me. I am His daughter.

You belong to Him as well. He pays attention and does not miss a thing in regard to you and your life. He is your Rock, Fortress, and Deliverer. He is your refuge. You are loved! Trust Him, today. 

Dee M. Kostelyk