Soar

I had a moment (a long one) at work today where I thought, "I'm destined for more than this." A teen yelled at me in the dining hall, slammed her tray and proceeded to give me the evil eye during our 45 minute delightfully awkward lunch. I did my best to pretend like I was unfazed and said cheerfully, "So, who would like to play a game!?" I was met with dead pan stares.

I found that the rest of the afternoon I felt inept, useless, and like I wanted to soar but my wings were broken. Even teenagers hated me. I was a loss. I started feeling tired. I wanted to state loudly, "Ya know. I'm actually way more than who you girls see me as - the old mom easily bullied at the lunch table." But, it wasn't them. They're there for a reason and it isn't because they're feeling well. It was me. My inner dialogue sucked (sometimes that word just fits). It eventually passed as I got distracted and my perspective changed. I'm okay now, but it made me think of how often we must play different roles in different situations: parent, employee, employer, facilitator, student, teacher, leader, follower, peacemaker, and so forth. We all have areas where we must operate within the confines of expectation and/or necessity. But, what about the value of being able to soar, of growing into our God created selves, and flying high using our spiritual gifts and passions? What about the freedom to be ourselves - our best selves UNHINDERED? John 10:10 talks about God giving us life to the fullest. The "fullest" begins the moment we accept Him as Lord and Savior and continues into eternity with Him! It is by communing with Jesus daily and reading His word, that we begin to better understand our value, purpose and significance. Too many of us are plodding along, run down, tired, and having no concept of our worth. When we don't have areas in our life where we can be free to soar as ourselves and bear spiritual fruit, it can lead to depression, low self-esteem and a subpar spiritual life. Maybe it won't be in your job or career, but make work of finding your free place. Ask the Lord for help and open doors to use your spiritual gifts. It makes me sad to see Christians walking around worried about others' feedback and wearing clipped wings. Don't let anyone do that to you! Be YOU, the one KNOWN and SEEN by God, who knit you together wonderfully. I don't care if you've been shot down and rejected in the past. Today is a new day whether you're 12 or 95. Go big and soar!

- Dee M. Kostelyk